When David was done with his bathroom booty call (and a quick save point), he walked back out and went to his desk. What couldn't have possibly been an hour was apparently enough, as his computer now flashed a pop-up menu. "Punch out for the day?" it asked with a blinking green "Yes" on it. He glanced around to ensure that there weren't any more eye-catching items or people, but nothing particular besides the fact that the clock had somehow jumped ahead about 6 hours ahead. He clicked yes and sat up, stretching out as a split second later, everyone other person in the office stood up and started to pack up.
"Hoo! Busy day, huh?" Goldie chimed, the cute blonde stepping up beside the tall brunette. He guessed that's what you could call getting paid for 6 hours spent in the bathroom. Charm must go a long way in Hot Cats.
"Yea, I was really breakin' a sweat in here," David smiled back at her, resting a hand on one of his wide hips. "What were your plans tonight?"
"Oh, nothing special. Head home, try to avoid any more accidents today. I saw on the Weather App to avoid Banner Street today. Giant robot attacks."
David stared at her a moment to see that she was serious, and a little text box came up in his vision. "Check the Weather App to find clues for item stashes and where you should (or shouldn't) explore next. It might save your ass!"
"Hmph," David scoffed. "Well here I am without any pockets..." He paused a moment, then let his grip on his body relax. His hand went up to his chest and dipped his fingers between his breasts, pulling a flip phone out of his cleavage. "Thank mother nature for giving me all these fun little holes to put things in," Krystal purred.
Sure enough, there was the app on his phone. A little chibi character of a busty woman with a tornado in the background blowing up her skirt. David decided there wasn't much to check at this point and flipped the phone back shut. He was planning to head back home, certain that something else would pop up. "Sounds good. Walk you home?"
The two of them left the building and they immediately saw the flash of police sirens around the corner. "Oh wow, what's that?!" Goldie gasped, hurrying ahead before David could think to stop her. He started to call her a dumbass, but then he considered the setup of New Pork City. There was public sex and gangs of monsters roaming the streets. If the police were there, it had to be one of the safest places in the city, and not because of their efficiency like real cops. If they were sticking around anywhere, it was probably something comically trivial.
Sure enough, he caught up to Goldie as she peeked over a few road blocks. A few cop cars were there, and a large hole in the road that looked like something had crashed through it. "Sorry, no entry, ladies," one of the officers ordered as soon as he came close. The officer was comically overweight, with a big outthrust gut and a 5-O'clock shadow.
A few random officers milled about the hole behind him, talking unintelligibly into radios, but a tall blonde caught his eye. She was far closer to Krystal than Goldie: leggy, curvy, and in a far-too skimpy outfit to look professional at all. She looked like they had run out of uniforms and given her the slutty Halloween costume version. Big, bubble-gum pink lips, a bubble butt, and a practical silicone valley of tits did little to add to her credibility.
"Wow, what happened? Ya think it was the robots?" Goldie pried. Everyone was quiet for a moment when David realized she was asking Krystal. David looked to the officer for any answers. "Sorry, no entry, ladies." One line of dialogue. Got it.
"Maybe that giant jackass I beat up landed here," David offered with a chuckle. "Would serve him right. It looks like it goes all the way down to the sewers."
"Oh, they weren't so bad. Wait... did you say the sewers?" Goldie asked in a puzzled tone. Before David could answer, there was a loud and distant humming noise like an overworked engine. He looked around for where it was coming from before a pair of junky hovercrafts suddenly rocketed out of the hole in the road, ramping right over the cops and landing near the ladies. A filthy, shirtless man with a mask of goggles and bandages rode on each one, making them look identically faceless.
"Oh no! Sewer pirates!" Goldie gasped theatrically in what was still clearly the underreaction of the year.
"New catches for the boss!" one of them snarled gleefully. "Get the big one!"
"Did you just call me fat!?" Krystal responded for him, bracing her hands on her hips. The hovercrafts roared and charged at the two women, and while David was puzzled as to what to do and what was happening, Krystal took over like his own instincts (or like a cut scene). The one sped right at him, but Krystal's long, thick legs quickly clambered up the inner tube part of the hovercraft despite its ridiculous speed. The sewer pirate grabbed for a knife in the compartment beside him, but he was clearly much more involved in driving than fighting.
Krystal easily grabbed him by the goggles and pulled him into a standing position. "I SAID!" she snapped as she backhand slapped him. "Did you just call me 'FAT,' you little shit!?"
The sewer fiend yowled from the smack. "Stop! Get off!"
"I get off when I want to, little boy!" Krystal purred just before she stomped a booted foot down on his balls. He shrieked even higher than ever, letting Krystal pull the goggles from his face and snap them back. The elasticity made them hit him with the apparent force of a sledgehammer, sending him flying backward and shredding him into red confetti against the huge, whirling propeller behind the craft. It came to a sharp halt without the punk to power its video game physics, bucking Krystal from its front. Fortunately, her curvy ass cushioned him from any real pain. He glanced around to see how Goldie and the other pirate were doing, just to see both answered at once.
"Not agaiiin!" Goldie squealed rather comically, arms flailing over her head. The pirate was already zooming back down the hole to the sewers, cackling madly.
"Come to papa!" he bellowed before vanishing back underground.
"Ugh. Shit water. And to think I usually like being dirty," Krystal groaned. Okay, all one-liners and snap reactions like that were making David appreciate the extra IQ point. "I could really use a shopping spree about now, though. These Pork Bucks are burning a hole in my pocket... if I had any."
A pop-up appeared in his vision. "Don't forget to spend your cash. Power-ups, combos, and weapons are available all over town."
"Shopping? Now?" David asked out loud. "She just got kidnapped!" He managed to step back and take some perspective on the situation, and pulled his cell phone back from out of his tits. He checked the Schedule app, and sure enough, there it was: "Main Mission - Rescue Goldie." It was a story mission. She was going to end up the same way no matter how much he took his time.
He looked up and sure enough, there was a green neon sign just a few meters away: "F. + Yu's Powerups. Getcha Game On!"
David sighed, making his enormous boobs puff up and bounce down. "You win, game. Safe, linear gameplay it is."
He pushed open the door, and the loud rap music hit him as soon as the door was cracked open. The room itself was dark for a moment, which he realized must have been a loading screen before it focused into a room loaded with weapons, gadgets, and what Dave imagined a supernatural pawn shop would look like. There was a gold-plated pistol lying on a shelf next to a shrunken head, and a boomerang and breastplate next to what appeared to be a ray gun. In the center of it all on the far side of the room, there was an upsettingly black man. Not that he had much exposure to city life, but he found it hard to imagine someone existed like this in real life anywhere off of a dated rap album. Gold chains, gold tooth, gold shutter shades, gold BEANIE CAP! The only things besides his muscular, midnight skin were pants that hung somewhere just above his knees and a white, sleeveless shirt that read “Black by popular demand” in scrawled out letters.
“There’s ma girl!” he blurted as Krystal came into view. To be fair, he had to shout to be heard over the blasting rap music. “How’s it been!? Come back for another booster shot for your jungle fever?”
David felt Krystal’s mental tug, eager for her own reply, but he knew what she would think. He’d just gotten her laid at the office, so she could wait. “Catch you next time. I’ve got placed to be, people to do.” Despite her low and sultry voice, he nodded. The game either projected him over the BGM, or he was good at reading her pouty lips.
“I dig! So whatcha need? You know that your dog Franklin’s always packin’ somethin’ special for ya!”
All David could think to himself was “Happy Black History Month, Hot Cats.” A menu came up next to Franklin, listing off a number of items. Several were Xed out, probably too high a level for him, and others were gray when he saw they were too expensive for him. It whittled his choices down some, but there was still notably more variety than the hot dog vendor.
The Sonic Vibrator (a hot-pink and purple sex toy that gave off visible air-distorting waves), Afro Desiac (a little cologne bottle with a Franklin-looking head sporting an afro for the cap), P.I.M.P. Hand (a rather large gold gauntlet with rings on the fingers), and Muscle Juice (a bright orange needle with a flexing arm on it) stood out at a glance as the more expensive items, but he wasn't sure he wanted to blow his entire wallet (or cleavage) on it. There was some cheaper items under the "One Use" section, like phallically-grasped bananas and popsicles for health boosts. There was also a glittery gold liquid in a shot glass, labeled as "The Lucky Shot: like a get out of jail free card that'll get you shit-faced."
"So... what's the Lucky Shot supposed to do?" David pried uncertainly, but everything came out confident when said through Krystal's voice.
"Oh that? It's the strong stuff, girl! That drank so good it's good for your soul! Makes your Luck shoot so damn high it's through the roof, baby! You can see some crazy shit happen when you down that motha fucka."
"Great," she mused. Despite its vague use, it was fairly cheap. "And what about the Sonic Vibrator? Is that a weapon, or a toy?"
"The Son Vibe? That shit'll bring any bitch to her knees, kn'what I'm sayin?" Right on cue, the door was kicked open. A young punk of a woman with a buzzcut and wearing nothing but jean shorts and a leather jacket held up a gun at them.
"Yo, hand over everythin' ya got!" she snapped. It reminded David of one of the girls he'd beaten up earlier that day, and it was possible she was just a slightly recolored version of her. David found his feet unable to move when he tried to approach her (maybe Franklin would give her a discount if he stopped her). Instead, Franklin pulled out the vibrator and hit a switch on it. The room hummed with a palpable power that shook a few items off the shelves.
It sent a wave right through David's body, and it felt like his very bones were vibrating from it. He had to stumble back and lean against a wall, eyes and mouth wide open as more importantly, the vibration centered right around his vagina. Even with Franklin almost 10 feet away and as fully dressed as Krystal could get, it was turning him on horribly. He hardly noticed that the robber was doing even worse, curled up in a ball on the ground moaning and with a hand stuffed down her shorts, rapidly fingering herself. David's hand went to his thighs to join her in the public masturbation when the buzzing hum suddenly stopped, and the arousal left him in an instant as if it had never happened.
He looked over to the robber who was still on the floor motionless apart from some heavy breathing. Franklin walked over to her, tossing the vibrator aside and kicking her in the stomach hard enough to send her flying out of the door she came through. "Getcha ass outta here! Bitches, huh?" he shrugged back at David as he regained his wits. "This bad boy's got a time limit, but you can do whatever you want with em while it's active. You interested?"
David did some quick budgeting in his head. Some back up didn't sound like a bad investment, given how his first boss fight went. "I'll take it. And a Lucky Shot for the road."
"That's mah girl! Make it rain!" Franklin cackled. The vendor's pleased grin and a general clinking of coins noise from nowhere told David that he wouldn't have to worry about handing over the cash himself. "Anything else I can getcha?"
David tested his theory and reached into his deep, warm cleavage. He somehow pulled out a still-full shot glass. "I think that's all I can afford for now."
"A'ight, well feel free to stop by the missus' place if you want to learn any new moves."
"The Missus?"
"Yea, girl! My wife Yu, with the dojo!" Franklin jerked a thumb over at a door in the wall he'd somehow missed earlier. David hesitated, but opened the door. There was in fact a full blown Asian dojo behind it, complete with wooden floors despite the concrete building. A tiny old Asian woman knelt in the front of it, no younger than 60 if had had to guess, and she was seemingly meditating on her knees on a small pillow.
"Your... wife?" David pried, giving Franklin a puzzled look and nodding towards the short, elderly woman.
"You know it!" boasted the over the top gangsta. "Bitch is wiiiild in the sack. But she's cool with you and me, so don't sweat it, sugartits."
David giggled and shut the door. A glance at the chalkboard menu told him already he wouldn't be able to afford any more special attacks just yet. "Later, I'm sure. Can't have the boys getting bored with me."
"That's the stuff. Here. Before ya go." Franklin produced what looked like a business card and held it out to David. When he gingerly picked it up to read, it was no such thing: it was a laminated card with "Proud to be ____", followed by a list of several races and nationalities. "Black, Asian, Latina, White, Irish, French, German, Jersey Shore..." Now that was some fine print.
"And this is...?"
"That's your Race Card. Fill that in and you can swap to any color or creed you want and get the benefits for it."
David furrowed his brow at the mention of benefits, wondering what he would gain from it in a game that was willing to go as stereotypical as someone like Franklin. "Thaaaaanks," he muttered, slipping it inside his cleavage with the rest of his cash and gear. "I'll be seeing you when I'm a little more in the mood then, Frank."
"You know it! Just remember; when you got Benjamins, come see Franklin."
When David went back outside, the cops still hadn't moved from their position of looking down the hole in the road and absolutely ignoring the kidnapping. Krystal sighed at the sight. "I guess if they did their job, New Pork wouldn't be New Pork... and my days would be a lot more dull." David hopped over the road blocks; more than twice his height vertically, like any self-respecting video game character, but with a lot more jiggling of his various juicy bits when he landed. The cops paid him no mind, apparently still really into that hole. A few turned once he was already past them just to look at her hip-wiggling strut, but no one stopped her as she jumped the ten feet down into the surprisingly spacious sewers.
"OH GOD! It's grosser than I thought!"
David landed in the bright green water of the sewers. That coloring didn't seem right to him, but he supposed it was better than the brown he had expected. The smell sure matched what he expected, and big globs of dripping sludge kept running down his body with a concerning warmth to it. Krystal was tall enough that she could wade through the waters of the almost cavernous sewers. The place looked more like a watery subway tunnel than a sewer pipe, which David supposed was just to have alternate travel routes and be more like the movies. He didn't know which way Goldie and her captors had gone, so he tried left. When his boobs hit an invisible wall and bounced him right back, he got the point and went right.
He didn't tread too far when the rev of an engine could be heard, and he saw another pair of the sewer pirates in their ratty clothes and scavenger masks and goggles steering their hovercrafts his way. David felt like one of them was the one that had gotten away with Goldie before, but it could just as likely have been a copy of the same mook since his buddy looked just about the same.
"Well well! Another stray bitch comin' to our playground!" one of them crowed in a raspy voice. He pulled out what looked like something between a flintlock pistol and a glock; a bulky, copper and wood gun but with a modern design to it that looked like a modern handgun. From the way it looked, David's limited knowledge of firearms told him there was no way it would work in a logical world. The other one pulled out a long and rusty machete, which David knew would work fine in either world.
The pirates howled and roared right towards him. David wasn't positive he could recreate the climbing attack that Krystal used in his "cut scene" earlier, knowing his games enough to know that a cinematic did not match actual character skills. He had full health though, so he timed out the lead pirate and punched squarely into the big rubber tube at the base of the craft. The vehicle bounced and froze in place, same as if it were any other enemy with a hit stun. David grinned with his puffy lips and sent a few bitch slaps back and forth across the inner tube, bouncing the craft in place until his finisher list came up. A few of them glowed Orange, and a pop-up came up to accompany them.
"Certain Finishers are only there for certain enemies, levels, or situations. Try them out! It's fun to experiment!"
David skimmed them quickly and just called one out. "Biggest Fan!" he declared, leaping up onto the front of the hovercraft and striking a pose; chest thrust out, hips cocked, and one hand on his hip with the other back behind his big, poofy 90s hair. It made his already huge tits stick out and jiggle even more, and the costume rode up on his crotch in a surprisingly pleasant sensation. The pirate's jaw dropped and he cackled hungrily, hands out to grab at the tempting prize. David smirked and slammed an upward, high heeled kick into his face. The pirate was sent flipping back out of his seat, hitting the fan as it emitted a sound like an electric razor clipping through some hair. A red mist shot out behind the fan in the opposite direction, but a few bones flew off to the sides. The scumbag's perfectly cleaned skull landed neatly on a large lever.
"Ugh, nasty," David winced, flicking it off with his boot.
Krystal continued the line for him. "Good thing I'm such a nasty girl~!" David was definitely starting to appreciate those IQ points. If nothing else, they were making him look like less of a spaz amidst all this action and sex.
The other pirate's pistol caught him square in the chest, making him wince and a minor chunk of his health bar disappearing. The bandit cackled and turned his boat around for another run while David growled. "Watch it, you shit! Those were expensive!" He plopped his round bottom in the seat and tried to figure out how this thing would work. He pushed forward on what looked like the gearshift and stamped his heel on the gas, quicking humming his craft to life and charging it at the remaining pirate. It was certainly faster than he was going while mucking through the sewage, but control was going to be an issue as his neck and hair whipped back from the sudden boost.
David rammed into the other hovercraft, and there was a clink as some of the many hooks, grates and bars around it stuck together. Apparently they were rigged to lock up rather than bounce around like crazy when they connected, probably to minimize the fans whipping around and shredding each other. The goon growled and raised his clunky gun, but with his focus on him, David easily dodged around the shot that pinged off the still-roaring fan.
A heavy swing of his shoulders let David's tits smack the pirate in the face, making him stumble against an armored hunk of metal. David followed up with a kick straight to his chest, grinding his heel against it as he wailed and the Finisher chart came up again. The pirates seemed to hit hard and move fast, but couldn't take much of a beating. "Let me Give You A Hand, sweety!" David cooed, lowering the stomping leg to rub its toe over the pirate's crotch. Again, he seemed to immediately forget his imminent danger, groaning and relaxing against the edge of his boat. David smiled and reached under the edge of his pants, following the lead of the Finisher as Krystal cupped his balls... squeezed, lifted him over his head by them, and threw the screaming pirate a good hundred yards off the boat. He landed with a dull splash as the boats disconnected, but David watched him to see if they got back up. There was no sign of him, but a low growl came from the direction as a huge, spiky tail seemed to dip out of the water. David shuddered briefly at the other myth about New York that would surely be true about New Pork... giant alligators.
He decided to just detach and speed off on his way. A few more raving pirates got in his way, but he had time to get used to the controls of his vessel. He found their sides were vulnerable, so he could sideswipe them or ram them into each other to get them stuck. Eventually he bumped them enough times that his vessel simply fell apart, flying into a motionless heap of scrap as he fell face-first into the sludge (Krystal had to moan "I wasn't expecting to get this sticky this early in the day..."). It was easy enough to reclaim another from a new pirate with a sturdier ride, but it was worth noting their limits enough to fight for himself more when he could.
Then he got to the crossroad; crudely painted-over street signs were there at a fork, both having one that read "The Boss." Each had one unique as well: "Caution! Sewer Kraken!" was on the left. "Heads up! Sewer Crocs!" was on the right. The hovercraft floated expectantly to a stop right at the fork. He considered the crocs he saw before and decided to take his chances with the kraken. They were stereotypically bigger, and he knew what tentacles did in this kind of game, but it sounded like better odds than a lizard the size of a small whale.
The raft moved along while David kept an eye out, but finally it lurched to a stop. He revved the engine a few times, but it didn't budge. He reached ahead a few feet to make sure there wasn't an invisible wall, then sighed. "Alright. Ominous. I get it." He stood up and cracked his knuckles as several splashes sounded and a number of purple tentacles burst from the water. David was more than expecting it, so he threw a kick into one that recoiled and flashed red from the hit. He turned and punched the second away, but the other two got him from behind. He rammed one that went for his chest with his elbow, but another was secured around his waist. It lifted him off his feet, kicking at the air while clawing at the meaty appendage.
"Oh no you don't! I've seen enough hentais, thank you!" David shouted at it. Another grabbed one of his legs, spreading it out as he gasped and shook his head. Mounting a stranger at the office was one thing, but having a limb the size of an actual anaconda shoving its way in her did not sound like a side of being a woman that he wanted to experience. One more went for his crotch, but his free leg kicked it to drive it off again. It seemed they were tough, but a single hard hit was enough to force them to fall back. It was all about keeping them in a pattern. He twisted his body to lean forward, even if the creature still had him in its grip. He reached out for the hovercraft and yanked and slammed any levers and buttons he could reach. It roared and shifted before suddenly it flew in reverse, its rear bumper ramming into the tendrils below him. The two limbs released him as a dull, echoing squeal came from the water.
However, by being free, there was now nothing holding him up. David had a moment to scream, which was a bad move on all fronts when he landed mouth-open in sewer sludge. He gagged and choked on it, trying to paddle around and feel where the surface was. He reached one of the walls instead, having been turned around in his tumbling fall. He gave a bubbling growl, but he felt something thick and curved there as well (that wasn't just Krystal's breast, anyway).
He opened his eyes enough to see that dug into the brick was a tremendous chain. Following it back to the middle of the murky river, he saw a huge, round shape, thrashing blindly with it tentacles at the area around it. It was also bearing a huge, metal collar around its pudgy neck.
David flexed his chest curiously. He didn't seem to have an oxygen limit, as best he could tell. There probably wasn't enough bodies of water in the city for them to have programmed it in. He braced his heels against the brick walls and pulled on the chain with all his might. He felt a dull ache as if it were working his actual muscles to do so, but there was a echoing clank as the chain's link was ripped from the wall. There was some puzzled bubbling noises from the center of the thing, David hoping it would just leave if it weren't leashed in place. He kicked his way back up to the surface and climbed onto his vessel once more, wringing the oily green liquid from his hair. "Alright," he huffed, glaring around at the tentacles floating around him. "You still wants some, you calamari cunt?"
The tentacles still lunged for him, David hopping back to avoid the first. He stomped on it as it slapped the raft instead of him, holding it down while he backhanded another. One wrapped around his chest, making his tits puff up more than ever as he groaned, not entirely out of pain. It felt like ages rather than a few hours since his tits had been rubbed like that. He bit his lip before that just gave him an idea, grabbing and biting into the tentacle. The hidden creature squealed and recoiled again, letting him land back on the craft. The last tentacle moved in regardless of its others, letting David wind up his leg and smash it right where he expected a groin (or tentsticles) would be. It flashed red and gave a huge squeal as his finishers popped up again.
This time, two in particular stood out to him. There was another red one, Tenta-Cruelty, but one glowed pink and read “Octopus' Garden”. Another pop-up came to the rescue.
"Pink Finishers have a chance of failing, but may seduce, charm or sweet-talk your opponent into helping you. You may avoid a fight, get a clue, or even gain an ally. Many enemies may be too intelligent, evil, or psychotic to be affected by Pink moves. Just hope that your Charm is high enough!"
"You want me to SEDUCE the sewer kraken!?" he yelped out loud. He swallowed hard. The thing WAS just an animal, right? And a chained up and mistreated one, if you thought about it. He sighed and focused on Octopus' Garden.
"Oh you poor baby," Krystal cooed for him with puckered lips. "Did the bad men hurt you? Let mama make it feel better." The tentacles froze and flashed pink for a second before the pink aura just like the Finisher's icon glowed around them. Two of them launched towards him, but David just opened his arms as they clung to him and rubbed affectionately. Rather than crushing, they sort of tickled. He laughed and planted a kiss on one of the sticky limbs (it wasn't like he didn't have sewer water in his mouth already). "There's a good boy!" he giggled as it rubbed over his thighs and breasts. It took him a minute of enjoying it too much before he realized its suckers had somehow wiped off the sludgy water. Finally its head floated up, looking about like a cartoon octopus would have in his head. Kind of a cuter version of an Octorok, with its big puckered mouth and perfectly circular, rubbery head. It bobbed in delight in front of him, as if waiting for something...
The pirates had their main vessel, more of a very large motor boat made of scrap metal than the rest of the puny ships. David could see about a half dozen of the pirates of various garb and gender, all of them filthy, marching impatiently around the deck. One big, burly one lounged back in a rusty, spiked throne, lazily operating some controls. He looked far more recognize and handsome than the rest, if splashed with mud and grease. He wore a scrap shoulder pad and a bayonet wrapped around his chest to show off his muscular body, but otherwise only wore a bandana and tattered leather pants. Clearly the man in charge, especially since he was sitting right next to the captive Goldie. The little office worker kicked and squirmed pathetically, suspended on a metal pole over the front of the boat like an antennae. “Heyyy, leggo! I was going to watch tv tonight!” she whined cutely.
They would see Krystal roaring after them in her hovercraft, smirking confidently at them. The captain laughed loudly as he sat up from his throne. "Well now! The one that got away jumps right back into my boat! Come to join your friend, have ye!?" he boasted in a Cockney accent, not quite piratey but in the right area.
"Something like that," David smiled. "But I brought a friend of my own along." He whistled a little tune, and the sewer kraken's tentacles burst up from the water on all sides of him (one pulling the ship itself along as a faster than normal pace). The crew shrieked like girls (especially the female ones) and ran for their various weapons, but the tentacles started to grab them right off the boat. The kraken smashed them into walls or threw them into its cute little tube of a mouth while David was free to jump onto the ship, facing the captain by himself.
"Like your spunk, girly," the captain grinned toothily. "I just hope you like mine." The scummy but handsome pirate oozed innuendo as he brought up his fists. David smirked back and shook his head.
"So what's your name, captain?"
"The boys call me Scrapiron. What's it to you?"
"Well, normally I buy a guy a drink first, but a name will have to do for now... before I do this!" David pulled out the Sonic Vibrator and flicked it. Goldie let out an embarrassed squeak and the lady pirates all moaned from their tentacle traps, but Scrapiron... stood there plainly.
"Hm? Never was much for the butt stuff. But thanks anyway," he shrugged casually before slugging David across the face with a punch that actually clouded his vision while his health bar dipped lower. A pop-up came up clearly though:
"Most Vibrator weapons only work on female opponents."
"Franklin, you son of a..." David groaned, rubbing his head and barely dodging Scrapiron's next punch. He switched off and tucked the vibrator back away, hoping it would be reusable after the wasted try. He threw a few high kicks into him, getting some grunts and driving Scrapiron back. He certainly didn't seem as tough as the mutant he fought this morning, given the lifebar dropping over his head, but he hit like a brute mook and moved much quicker. Plus, the ship didn't give much space to dodge. He only flinched briefly from David's hits before he suddenly grabbed her by the hair, driving a knee into Krystal's soft stomach.
"OAHHH!" she grunted loudly, backing up with her ass out and holding her gut. David saw the pirate try to rush him, so he swung a quick uppercut that knocked the pirate all the way back into his throne. He shook his head as David rushed in, but the captain grabbed the lever next to him... and ripped it right out to swing across David's face as a club.
David's vision blurred again, and he fell to his knees. He saw his health was dangerously low, already around 75% when he showed up after the pirates. A healing item sounded great right now, but he'd wasted it on the vibrator instead. He had just a scrap of health left, but Scrapiron suddenly kicked him right in the mouth. A brief spray of blood went from his pouty lips before he landed flat on his back in the boat, staring up as Scrapiron stood over him. His health bar blinked between red and empty, and he found himself barely even able to move. Was he dead?! Was this it!? Did save points work for him!?
"I don't usually try the merchandize so early, but a pretty thing like you..." Scrapiron undid his tattered pants, kneeling in front of David as his erection emerged. Krystal managed to reach up to grab at his hands, but he pushed them down and overpowered her. No! No no no no no! David's mind went crazy, but it was hard to act through the haze of a body with no HP. The Lust meter appeared overhead, and it was looking dangerously high. A blue meter appeared at one side of his vision while a red one with Scrapiron's stupid handsome mug appeared on the other.
"Struggle Events! Fight back to raise your bar before they get theirs maxed out! On the other hand, making an opponent reach their 'Burst' point on their meter will make them weaker for the fight."
"You want me to let him rape me!?!" screamed David in disbelief at the pop-up. Scrapiron tore the crotch of Krystal's clothes aside, holding one arm down while he stuffed himself inside of her. David's mind went wild between fighting off the empty health bar, Krystal's lust, Scrapiron's sexual assault, and the first time he'd ever been penetrated so roughly. The office worker was nothing compared to the pirate; he was raw and sweaty and muscular and hung... it felt so good in its own way, and Krystal's Lust meter was dropping just by him being inside her...
No! Enough of about that! He didn't want to learn the rules about having cum inside him during a fight! David looked around past the meters and pop-ups for anything that could help him. Goldie was tied up, the kraken was a long way back behind the speeding boat, beating up more pirates, and a sign went by with more paint on it marking "Banner Street."
The one that Goldie had mentioned... the app! The robot attack! The Lucky Shot! David's hand left Scrapiron's to suddenly grab his own tits, popping out the Lucky Shot and chugging the golden liquid. Scrapiron looked at her strangely, stopping in the act as her tits vibrated. He grabbed a big handful of her tits in his strong hands ("Dammit, stop loving this!" David thought), and pulled out her cell phone. "Caution! Giant Robot activity at record levels today! Avoid Banner Street at all-"
There was a massive crash from overhead. A shiny, chrome fist the size of a minivan shot through from the manhole above them, smashing right into Scrapiron's head. He flew like a cannonball across the boat, a few teeth flying from his head as he smashed into Goldie's pole. He fell limp as a rag doll against it, and Goldie fell loose from the ropes as they fell from her.
"Phew! I warned you, didn't I?" Goldie giggled, looking up casually as police sirens and gunfire met the rampaging robot. "Crazy weather today." She then frowned and kicked the motionless Scrapiron in the side. "And you! I said I didn't want to come! The nerve, huh?" Scrapiron gave a few mumbled noises, indicating he was still alive. David spotted some loose chain and went to tie him up.
"Sorry if I'm late," David said, seeing his health meter go up a few notches to indicate the fight was really over and he was starting to rest up. "I had some trouble on the way."
"Oh, it's okay. My dad can be stubborn sometimes. I wanted you to meet him some day anyway."
"Wait, your-"
"Half sewer pirate. Yea. Don't you see it in the hair?" Goldie ran a hand through her silky blond locks while some sewer water and blood ran from Scrapirons.
"Goldie Scrapiron..." David muttered, shaking his head. He looked back to his shot glass, shook out the last few drops, and threw it overboard, where his faithful kraken pet caught it in his mouth. "Damn the things I have to do to get laid sometimes..."
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